Happiness is a Practice and You're Invited!

Hi! I'm Tamara, one of the happiest people I know. Probably, one of the happiest people you know. And this morning I cried on my yoga mat.

Being happy doesn't mean we're happy ALL of the time. I don't feel happy ALL day long, and I do feel happy every single day. Yes, every single day, throughout the day, no matter what life is throwing at me, I feel joy. I feel happiness. I feel content. I feel ease. Not ALL day. But every day.

The reason that I teach the skills and habits of happiness, and why I'm giving a free masterclass, Practical Happiness: 3 Keys to Lower Stress & Up-Level Joy (even during the holidays!), on Friday, is because the tools work... when I use them. Some days, I have to use every tool in my kit to keep afloat. I have 3 teenagers, for goodness sake. Some days feel easy and I can breeze through. But the thing is, as long as I'm doing the work, which is so worth the effort (because the result is feeling happy/content/at ease more often than not) I get to feel good. No matter what is happening in my life. I get to feel good.

Wouldn't that be nice? To feel good more often? To lower your stress and up-level your joy? Then get your booty over to that link you'll find in the event Practical Happiness: 3 Keys to Lower Stress & Up-Level Joy (even during the holidays!) and register to hang out with me for an hour or so and feel more joy. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain. See you there. Email me if you have questions. I got you.

#createalifeyoulove #happiness #practicalhappiness #wellbeing #usethetools #parenting #teenagers #divorce #transitions

10 Books to Guide You Along Your Path to Greater Happiness

At a recent talk that I gave, an audience member asked for a list of books that I would recommend for people on their path to greater happiness, whether just starting out, or well on their way.

I compiled a list of my favorites, obviously including the two that opened me up both inside and out to my own greatest passions and a lifetime of happiness habits. Here is that list for you!


1. Happy for No Reason - Marci Shimoff

2. The Gifts of Imperfection - Brene Brown (any and every Brene Brown book is worth a read and this one is a great place to start!)

3. The Passion Test - Janet Bray Attwood and Chris Attwood

4. Hardwiring Happiness - Rick Hanson

5. The Buddha's Brain - Rick Hanson

6. No Matter What!: 9 Steps to Living the Life You Love - Lisa Nichols

7. Life Visioning: A Transformative Process for Activating Your Unique Gifts and Highest Potential - Michael Bernard Beckwith

8. The Untethered Soul - Michael Singer

9. Untamed - Glennon Doyle

10. Take Control of Your Life - Mel Robbins

Those selections are a great place to start and will lead anyone who reads them down a delightful rabbit hole of personal development! Plus, there’s my own sweet, little PDF book, 10 Tips for Dating Yourself! If you’re ready to improve the quality of the relationship that you have with yourself, request your copy in the comments below or email me!


*** Purchasing through the (affiliate) links provided may add a few cents to my pocket and that is deeply appreciated!

Change is Not a Prerequisite for Happiness

Situations don't always get better. People might never change. We don't have control over those external things. But you know what you do have control over? How you respond to them.

Respond. Responsibility. The ability to respond.

This is where your control lies. No matter the situation. No matter the person that you're dealing with. No matter for how long you have it or them to deal with... you always have the ability to respond in a way that is respectful. Not to them... to you.

Behaving in a way that builds your own self-respect is what matters here. Responding in a way that feels right and good - not shit!y. Not petty. Not low like they can go. Oh, sure... you can run all of those scenarios through your head or with a trusted friend... trust me, it feels good to get it out. But when you actually respond - take the high road. You'll feel good about yourself. And that other person? They don't matter. What they think of you is none of your business.

That situation? It doesn't have to change. You don't *need* it to change to be happier or to feel better about it. Doing your best, on the high road, is enough. You are enough.

#createalifeyoulove #divorce #narcissist #highroad #selfrespect

Introducing... me!

Hi there! It's been awhile since I introduced myself, so in case you're new here, I'm Tamara. I'm a speaker, coach, and certified happiness trainer!

A lot of people ask me how I got into the happiness business and it's because for a long time, I was deeply unhappy. I could remember a time when I had been happy, but I hadn't felt that way for a very long time.

About 10 years ago, I felt stuck in a relationship that was extremely toxic. I had gone from a confident, vibrant woman to insecure and ashamed. I didn't like who I was anymore and I had let my (ex) husband's voice become louder than my own. I believed it, for awhile, when he told me that I was too loud, that I complained too much, that I ruined everything, that I should be ashamed of myself, that I was a disgusting person. He even told me one Christmas that the song from The Grinch was really all about me.

It's no wonder so many people suffering in abusive relationships don't leave. They don't know they're worthy of something better because they've been broken down by someone who is supposed to love them. But abuse isn't loving.

Luckily for me, there was still a part of me that didn't believe him. My light was dimmed, but it hadn't gone completely out. We humans have a strong survival instinct and mine pushed me to reevaluate my life. I had children, daughters, and I didn't want them growing up thinking that this was how a man was supposed to treat a woman. I had a son and I didn't want him thinking that his father's behavior toward me was acceptable.

As the Universe does, it gifted me with a chance meeting of a woman named Michelle. She was a Certified Passion Test Facilitator. I didn't know what that was, but I remember feeling a full-body tingle and a sureness that it was meant for me.

Taking the Passion Test was the beginning of a radical transformation in my life. I began consciously creating the experience that I wanted and my #1 Passion was to "live authentically from my heart and soul."

Each day, I started choosing in favor of that passion and I began repairing my relationship with myself. Eventually, I was able to gather the courage to leave my marriage and live again. Over the past 8 years, I've reclaimed my own voice, my confidence, and am now one of the happiest people I know, living the life of my dreams. It isn't perfect, but some days it sure feels like it.

It's a gift to be able to work with others who are newly single to help them reclaim their own confidence, hope, and happiness. And this is what I do for a living now. By sharing my experience and the myriad tools and practices that I utilized along my path, I speed up the process from being a sad single to loving life solo for my clients. We unpack the baggage of past relationships so that they can go into the next one a lot lighter. We strengthen their inner voice so that it goes from being critical to supportive. We build the muscles of courage and happiness by taking baby steps and allowing ourselves to feel our natural, human emotions without, or at least with less negative, judgment.

For years now, I've helped people create lives they love. I run a local (to the Detroit Metro area) #Meetup every month, workshops, I speak to local groups and communities on the actions and habits of happiness, and I coach individuals and groups so that they can go from wherever they're starting to where they truly want to be in their lives.

Today, I'm putting my focus on people who are newly single who are ready to consciously create a better, happier life for themselves, whether they were the ones to leave a relationship or the one who was left.

Next Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, I'm hosting a free training on the 3 Keys to Loving Your Solo Life and I'd love to see you there! You can attend via my Facebook Lives in my new group, Rediscovering Yourself...Single by joining here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5209340529132041/

or via the event, here: https://www.facebook.com/events/723069188881699

Whatever you're feeling today, it is totally possible to love your life and the most important relationship for you to focus on today is the one that you have with yourself. Once you love your solo life, you open up the possibility to create the relationship of your dreams. That next-level love is available to you... but first, you have to love yourself. Ready to learn how?

Join me!


*** I’m so willing to embrace imperfection that I even posted this photo after noticing something in this pic that the former version of myself would have never posted!!! Bonus points if you comment on what it is!

Do You Walk Your Talk?

My integrity is a guiding force in my life ever since the first time I took the Passion Test and realized how out of alignment I was from the life that I wanted and the life that I was actually living.

When I'm choosing in favor of my Passions, I am in alignment. When I am walking my talk, I am in alignment and in integrity. When my words don't match up with my actions I feel discord in my body. As if the parts within me are somewhat out of place. I am my own spiritual chiropractor and so I adjust. Sometimes it takes mere minutes, sometimes days, and sometimes much, much longer. And the awareness is there and the discomfort and discord grow stronger and louder until once again, I take action and make changes so that I feel back in integrity. Back in alignment with my highest Self. With my Passions. With the life that I am choosing to create on a daily basis.

When I am in integrity, my respect for myself grows. When I am living with integrity my love for myself grows.

If you struggle with your relationship with yourself, with loving or respecting yourself, notice if your walk matches your talk. If it doesn't, perhaps it's time to adjust your step and realign. Need help doing so? Reach out. Email me and let's chat. We're meant to feel good in our lives. Integrity is our guide. Let's get you back into yours.

Awareness is where we start...

I’m grateful for this beautiful conversation with the open and authentic, Laura Bender. I love all of my podcast interviews and this one was especially meaningful. Laura doesn’t hold back her own curiosity or emotion and it’s a beautiful thing.

I hope you’ll glean something from our conversation and remember that you can only ever start right where you’re at. That’s where all beginnings begin.

Exploring Conditioning and Personal Responsibility

There are special people in the world who, just by being in their presence, open us up to ourselves. Brian Berneman of The Conscious Action Podcast is one of those people. I had the pleasure of being his guest recently and the conversation was inspiring.

In our conversation, I share my story of how I came to leave my marriage of 15-years. Then, we talk about our conditioning and how to overcome it by taking personal responsibility for our life experience. Plus, so many more beautiful areas of conscious living.

If you’re feeling stuck in any kind of situation and want to connect with the part of you that has the courage to overcome it, I encourage you to have a listen. Then, let me know what you think. Have you been through a similar situation or are you there now? Reach out. Email me. Let’s talk.